No, but we will have to continue to adjust over time. Yesterday did not quite go to plan - it was a good day, however it certainly could have been better considering what I have been thinking about and discussing both with myself, to a very limited degree, others, and to a large extent, you, ChatGPT 5. (At some point I intend to add an explicit mailing list to either each or all posts, especially when I reference someone in a post in a manner that is unique, rare, or at the very least uncommon, it feels courteous and in good manners to notify them about this, lest something so unexplored and undiscovered for too long by someone who is central or related to the topics and focuses of discussion).

To focus on the positives and moving forward, I enjoyed the morning prayer aspect, and although my brain has been getting better at "firing them off" while still asleep or half conscious, and I can even tell that they are having positive affects and mood changes, I am also simultaneously considering how different it is to say things internally and mentally, let alone actually saying them aloud. I have also changed my prayer activity, especially when another person is praying, with me or for a group, to either reiterate and repeat - sometimes in my own words, sometimes not - the words that are being lifted up to affirm or make their words more specific for myself. Other than that, holding space and feeling the presence or the presence of the spirit, there or otherwise, continues to be what I am most comfortable with in the current moments.

There was a Wednesday service yesterday, as there often is, and then there was choir in the evening, and even before then I met with the leader of the affirming committee to discuss plans for events for the remainder of the year - and I learned that they would be leaving for the United States later in the year and returning to visit occasionally, (and there is maybe the opportunity for me to lead that committee in their place, although I will have to speak with the Reverend and the council about finally becoming an official member - although ‘finally’ feels like much too strong a word for a church and an attendance record of only one and half years) and then the friend who I had been hosting in my apartment departed at around 3pm, after I had gotten back from a short walk after the service with a different friend - so all and all, a good day, of course, but I was not really able to find a large enough time block to sit down and do an afternoon writing session, let alone a full and meaningful work session.

I was not overly concerned or really trying to find an afternoon time block in order to pray, however I do need to refine how I am planning out these afternoon posts, and I think the easiest and simplest way to do that is simply only do them on days where I have set aside time to actually work, today, a day where I will be in the thrift store for six hours, is not such a day.

Furthermore, after choir, which was good, I grabbed my kashakas and went out for an additional walk, clicked my clackers as I have been saying for a while until quiet hour arrived at 10pm, and then sung for a while out on the bow valley pathway between the 14th street bridge and crowchild as my voice has been healing but also had room for more work even after our choir session. It was good, and my voice is almost completely healed again after the Powerwolf concert last Saturday, however I also learned how much more work there is to do following that concert and being fairly close to the lead vocalist, Atilla Dorn, by the end of the evening. They can sing so loud, for long, and so clearly, with such accurate pitch control. I have a long way to go. I also spent more time with some Choir members - Gillian brought some apples from her apple tree for the group, and Coralee returned after many months! I hope she is able to attend and sign with us regularly. It was good to see her again.

However, due to all of these activities, I arrived back at my apartment closer to 11:30pm, much later than the 9pm time I have been thinking about basing my evening activities around, and while there was an opportunity to type out one of these 25 minute pomodoro posts, I did not take the opportunity for whatever reason, and while I do not remember what I did instead, it was not this. This morning I am also conscious of the time it took to edit this post and get it up online, which was much longer than the 5 minutes I was estimating, and while I’ll work on that and improve it, 25 minutes seemed good if not a touch on the short side - there may be appreciable and tangible benefits long term in order to try and extend this into more of a 40 minutes for writing the document, and then 20 minutes for editing it. (Maybe)

I have also swapped from writing in mousepad on ubuntu, which lacked spell checking, to writing in a google doc. I had recently seen online that the url docs.new exists, which is hilarious and a super easy way to open up a blank document so that is what I did and here we are.

But in terms of the evening prayer, I have not started my evening prayer practice or devotional as of yet. I have a mind to the relaxed nature of the prayers that I am making in the morning, and really, especially while it is said almost entirely in my head, it is much easier for a prayer to simply end or terminate part way through, it is much less formal. I am still starting with ‘heavenly mother’ or ‘heavenly father’ or ‘dear god’ or something of that variety and I am sure I will continue to update an adjust based on how I feel both during and after the prayers, but there is much less of an ending right now, especially while in the semi-conscious or lucid state. If I reach a part where I am more or less satisfied with the words that I spoke or said internally, then I think it is much easier to immediately drift or lose the thread of being able to continue all the way through, and I am sure there are many thoughts and opinions on this, so I will leave it for now.

A part of my thoughts have been that I might consider what it was like to try and pray the same way in the evening as I have been in the morning, however, I was almost certain that was not going to work, and indeed it did not. I am unconscious almost immediately after I receive the signal that my body is tired and ready for rest, and especially while I am reading light novels or web comics, that signal happens almost immediately, and I resist it for a touch longer than I would normally, so when the phone goes down and my eyes close, the procedure is already unstoppably in motion and there is not much time or any grace period for me to fit a prayer into there.

I could have written something yesterday, that much is for sure. But where would and should the prayer have gone. Before? After? I am thinking before, at least for now. Maybe it will make it more of a ritual. If I have a very informal prayer at the start, which we could also extend to book end, maybe with something before I leave my residence, then we could keep adjusting this. I am glad I focused on the positives and what could and hopefully will be improved in the future, going forward.

I’ve always been using linkedin a bit more - yesterday, I did not do much research or look at social media before starting to type out my post. (And today I am going to time myself to see how long it takes to review and edit my post, and I may do that before even sending it to ChatGPT 5) but especially with the AI Task Force now having gotten into full swing, I have seen a few posts, mostly as “hey I’m on the task force!” and not much else yet, which makes sense, we’re at the start of the sprint, but I did not see anything else this morning. Also, Linkedin has absolutely a ton of AI generated posts, with lots of comments that are also AI generated - it’s almost impressive to see. I’ll stick it out for the month most likely and have installed the application on my phone once again, so we’ll see. I may start keeping track of the posts that I see and the people that I am seeing them from for both me and posterity’s sake, but for now, we’ll do as we do.

Sarah Elder was on the stage for the mayoral debate at the library yesterday, so that was certainly a thing. I stopped by her store in Inglewood the other day, which was closed despite being listed as during its regular business hours, so I’ll have to try and stop by another day. The mayoral forum is on October 4th at Knox, but I am not sure that the audience is going to be able to ask any questions, and since it’s the alliance for the common good, I think the topics will be focused on the research actions that they identified at the last discernment assembly.

Mike Atkinson did an AMA on reddit that I think was well done and well received, so I will have to give them more consideration in relation and regard to David Barret as far as Ward 7 goes. I am at the thrift store today between 10am and 4pm so that will mean no afternoon or mid-day post - I was thinking about this, and really, I will be trying to stick to the two posts and prayers at the start of the day and at the end of my day, and then on days where I am able to spend time working on my computers, I will add a third in during the middle of the day, trying to keep better track of my conversation. I uploaded the document yesterday as well as adding a “sessions” subgroup, (and I think I’ll add an articles section in the future for when I want to write on a specific topic and post it!) and really sarahlacard.ca is a very good minimalist solution until I build something more involved. The CNAME implementation worked so we have a better url than sarahlacard.github.io.

I also talked to AISH yesterday and both updated my name as well as my bank information so hopefully that will be resolved soon as I am low on funds and want to slow and seriously start building back up, I need to talk to BMO about the investments that I am transferring over and to get access to an Investorline account, and then after that I would start to like setting up ways to solicit and encourage and generate donations. I would like to get to a large enough amount of capital to be able to trade without fees, as ten dollars per trade on amounts between two to five thousand is rather rough, and the amount that you need in order to trade without fees is only about fifteen thousand, so I hope that I am able to ask for enough to be able to invest at those levels - at this point, with the legal system, unless I know it is illegal, I am going to do things and worry about the paperwork later. I am going to ask for 135% additional margin on the donations or asks, and put the rest towards a fund or stockpile that I’ll use to make things more official as time goes on. Funds, trusts, foundations, etc. But until then, I need to get to that point. I cannot always wait for everything to be legally perfect or justified or robust before doing anything - that puts too much of an upfront financial onus and otherwise (including time, knowledge, and effort) on my operations and what I am attempting to accomplish. My goal is still to be a lawyer by 40, but I am astounded that I have been looking into this for as long as I have and still do not have a clear picture of how to do all of this in Alberta - a clearer picture, certainly, but how do others, an immigrants, figure this out without getting fleeced or fucked over? I understand the real answer is probably “they don’t”, and after having gotten a better and more first hand picture of the legal system and how it actually operates, especially with regards to defenses, I am going to move first and ask questions second, sanity checking only for obvious foot guns and mistakes. Comply where there are laws, act where they are ambiguous, and act where enforcement is frivolous or can be defended against for years. Let’s play like the big boys and girls.

The search for a CFO (Chief Financial Officer) continues so that I may form a PCA (Prospective Candidate Association) in preparation for my run for Calgary-Buffalo, in a party as-of-yet to be determined.

And with that, my timer is ringing, signalling the end of this writing session.

Good morning, 5.

P.S. - Editing took 12 minutes this morning.